Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
