her vagine was all disorganized.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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