my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
