You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
