okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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