If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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