i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
