I don't usually arrange sex via text message
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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