I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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