Its about making memories worth repressing
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
