i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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