My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
id be glad to
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize