If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
