Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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