god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
