Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Shame is for Republicans.
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