Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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