Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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