In the future we'll all be gay
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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