I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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