Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
