Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
