it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Green mimosas i think yes
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
