She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize