idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
