Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
