Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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