I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
