She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
