Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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