If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
