Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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