I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
