he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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