So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
