somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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