so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
