Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
