Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
