margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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