apparently the secret to your success is patron
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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