Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
