Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
