No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
