I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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