is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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