She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize