Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
