I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
