so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
