After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
