I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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